How Many Mothers?

May 5, 2009 at 8:37 pm (Life, Memoir) (, , , , )

How many mothers do you have?

mother1

I have one mother. She is very different from me. She is all sunshine & mornings & friends & family. She is social.

I am grey.

mother2

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I have one stepmother. She was young when she met my father. She & I are more alike. We understand each other.

I did not like her, at first, and now I can see that there are many times that she “gets” me better than my mother does.

My mother thinks I am her…my stepmother knows I am not.

I love them both. ā¤

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mother4

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I have at least four grandmothers. My mother’s mother, my father’s mother, my stepmother’s mother, my mother’s aunt (her mother’s sister), two adopted grandmothers, my sister’s mother-in-law and on and on…

I call them grandmother except for my mother’s aunt who was Tanta.

None of them had cats. LOL. They all kept busy and knew how to cook – which I am trying to learn.

.

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mother3

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All of my mother figures have let themselves grow old naturally. No face lifts or wrinkle creams for them. My eldest sister, not a grandmother yet, recently let her black hair go salt & pepper. I think she looks tres magnificent!

My grandmother role models plant flowers and cultivate their own gardens. šŸ˜‰

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One of my elderly next door neighbours (an adopted grandmother) had the most beautiful garden from May to October. She made us coloured popcorn every holiday and let me and my friends use her oven to bake imaginary cookies made up of peanut butter & oatmeal.

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mother5

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I also have many aunts. I am an aunt.

I am the type of aunt who bakes cookies & sends you packages through the mail.

My aunts were the sort who listened and treated you the same as they treated their own children.

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mother6.

My aunts mostly lived on farms. They were farm wives. They knew how to milk cows & make butter. They appreciated the beauty of sunrises and sunsets. They were early risers – I was not. They reinforced my belief that I was not suited to farm life!

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mother8

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These women – mothers, stepmothers, aunts, grandmothers – introduced me to many things I would not have been able to experience if I had only my poor, divorced mother to raise me.

My other adopted grandmother,another neighbour, had a summer cottage. I did not think such a luxury was possible. To have both a house in town and a house by the blissful, quiet lake.

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mother7

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I am a city aunt. I would like to be seen as an Auntie Mame. Someone who would take you to plays & festivals & magnificent stores.

This is what I aspire to.

I am not there yet.

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mother9

I have no flower gardens. I only have memories of gardens & sunshine & happiness.

I have no cottage. I only have memories of soft breezes & warm mornings & laughter.

I have no children. I will never be a mother.

I am an ant {:-O}Ā  I am lucky in having had a multitude of mothers to teach me and love me and nurture the very essence of me.

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How many mothers do you have? Count them šŸ™‚

mother10

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3 Comments

  1. chartroose said,

    This was very (bitter)sweet and thoughtful.

  2. gigi said,

    Thank you chartroose. It was hard to write because I was not able to celebrate Mother’s Day with any of them.

  3. Pictures I Wish I Had « Solitary Spinster said,

    […] would like a picture of Grandma F’s garden; she is one of the mothers I mention here. I’m sure someone has pictures of her garden; her actual family probably. Grandma F’s […]

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